I miss my mom tonight. She died a week ago tomorrow. She was my rock and my connection to my family. Now what?? If only I knew. I won't see her smiling face or hear her words of wisdom anymore except in my mind. I miss you mom and love you so very much.
I was on a wonderful trip east with one of my best friends, Chris. She gave me a true gift of allowing me to travel with her from Seattle to D.C. However, my trip was cut short in Pittsburgh as my mom took a turn for the worse and I had to fly home to be by her side. Last Saturday I sat with her alone for 3 hours talking to her, holding her hand, and rubbing her face, hair and arm. It hurt to see her slipping away. On the other hand, it was healing to be with her and share that time with her. My daughter, Bryanna, flew in from Charlotte to say good-bye to her Nana. My son, Kai, also had the chance to say good-bye. When she died I was with two of my three kids and that meant soooooo much.
I wish to thank Chris for my wonderful opportunity to travel with her through beautiful states, to Yellowstone National Park, Mount Rushmore, and the Badlands. What a gift. It is something I will treasure the rest of my life. I also want to thank her and Marilyn for all their support in guiding me to come home to be with my mom. Chris, Marilyn and Gayle have been an enormous sense of comfort during this hard time. I want them to know how much I appreciate their friendships and how much I truly love them.
My mom's service is going to be October 18th. This will be the next opsticle. I will have friends and family around me to help me through this. I am truly blessed.
My mom and I shared so much together. We traveled to Alaska and Canada together and had wonderful times. I will miss her, but her memory burns bright inside me and through my daughter, Bryanna. Bryanna is so much like my mother. She shares my mother's aspirations and people skills. They are both wonderful people and have and will touch many lives.
I miss you mom and love you very much. Thank you for being part of my life.
4 comments:
AnnE,
Your blog came out wonderfully and it is a good outlet, for people to share their thoughts and put them in writing. This is a difficult time for everyone, but now we shall live the lessons that she and Dad shared with us...I dreamt last night that mother dad and David were walking hand and hand..and dad wasn't giving anyone else a chance to speak until Mother told him to shut up Arthayer...I shall read your blog often...thanks for sharing...
Hi AnnE, such fun to "see" you here. I love the picture of you and Nana--and writing is indeed a wonderful outlet for grief. When my mom died, I wrote a series of letters that have actually since been published in a Women's Studies collection--it's the most raw of times, and produces the most authentic words. Our love is with you--I'm so glad I'll be able to see you in October. It will be a gift to celebrate Nana together!
Hi Anne,
What a wonderful photo of you and Nana. Was that at Bryanna's wedding? I remember how she beamed when everyone sang happy birthday to her at the reception. There are so many wonderful memories. I'm glad I will get to see you in October. Be gentle with yourself during this difficult time.
Hi AnnE, I think your blog is awesome! I'm gonna put a link to your blog on my blog! I know you really miss your mom. Believe me I can relate. I understand just how hard it is, but I also know just how strong you are. I'm glad you enjoyed our cross country adventure. I love you my friend!
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